Where Does your Loved One Go?

Where does your loved one go?

A harsh and seldom known reality is the subject of this post.  We share this information as part of an effort to better educate and inform the public.  When a death occurs, among the first responses is contacting a funeral home.  Often, you are distraught and not of a sound mind when you make this call.  The importance of who is on the other line answering that phone call can’t be underscored.   Not only should it be a voice of consolation but also of trust.  There are few moments in life where trust is more imperative.

A funeral director will gather preliminary information from that initial phone call.  They will ascertain where the death occurred and make arrangements to send licensed personnel to the location.  But do you know where your loved one is then taken?  Have you ever asked your funeral director where they are bringing your loved one?  Probably not, who would think to ask?  It is assumed, but should not be.                     

If you ask the directors of Coxe & Graziano Funeral Homes of both Westchester and Greenwich and Zion Memorial Chapel, the answer will unequivocally be, YOUR LOVED ONE IS RETURNING TO OUR CARE, IN OUR LOCAL FUNERAL HOME.  Not only do we employ full time licensed directors with dual state licensure, we also have in-house facilities that allow your loved one to immediately be brought to our premises.  Do NOT take this for granted, it is NOT the protocol of every funeral home.

If, for example, you contact a funeral home that is part of the conglomerate, your loved one may be going back to “central operations.”  So if you are calling for service in Greenwich, you may not be serviced in Greenwich.  These conglomerates operate under a true business model where operations are streamlined out of key locations and other buildings are strictly satellite offices.  When you call for service at a corporate funeral home in Greenwich, your loved one is likely transported to a location other than Greenwich.   You will be encouraged to meet your funeral director for arrangements in Stamford as well as and deliver clothing and belongings to this other location.  It is more cost effective for them but it comes at a price for you, eliminating your peace of mind.  For the Jewish community, you should have heightened awareness regarding your loved one’s whereabouts.  If you contact a conglomerate funeral home, your loved one might make a stop or several along the way.

Similarly, if you are contacting a funeral home without on-premises refrigerated facilities, your loved one may brought by a third party funeral director to his or her primary place of business, often across state lines.  If you are in Connecticut contacting a smaller funeral home after hours, your loved one may be transported to the Bronx and then returned to Greenwich the next business day.

Our message to you, the family, is to ask important questions.  Never be ashamed to ask as many questions as required to afford you peace of mind.  Ask where your loved one is going?  Don’t assume it is a straight path to the funeral home of your choice.  For the Graziano family, this is among the most basic comforts we can provide to those who call upon us, the knowledge that your loved one is safe in our care. 

As with any selection you make in life, it makes a difference who you call.  Not all funeral homes are the same.  Ultimately, the choice is yours to select one that you believe will best suit your needs.  But we urge you to educate yourself on issues such as these.  We suggest you interview funeral homes and funeral directors, as all are not the same.  There is a difference with us, and we pride ourselves on it.

For more information, please contact us any time at info@coxeandgraziano.com or by calling 914-698-5968 or 203-869-5968.



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